Prior's Shoulder Declared Dead

Mark Prior's right shoulder, which fought valiantly through six years of chronic pain and injuries, was finally declared dead today by famed surgeon Dr. James Andrews. The shoulder, pictured at right, had once been considered one of the most promising of its generation.

"At the end, I think it was just ready to go, and we encouraged it to just walk into the light," said Dr. Andrews.

The shoulder will be laid to rest between "Cubs Fans' Belief in Prior," which finally died sometime last year, and "Prior's Potential," which passed away in 2003. Still left unknown, however, is whether Chicago authorities will seek to extradite Dusty Baker for his role in the shoulder's death.

"The evidence is all there that Dusty murdered it," said a Chicago prosecutor familiar with the details of the case. "The question is, can we prove intent?"

The shoulder is survived by Derrek Lee's wrist, Alfonso Soriano's hamstring, and Michael Barrett's testicle.