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Wait...Yeah, I Think I Just Had an Idea
Written by wrigleyville   
Friday, 22 August 2008
Okay, not really. I'll credit Chip Wesley over at Thunder Matt's (RIP) Saloon for spurring my thought process. But, his last paragraph brought me a moment of clarity...a moment of pure, unadulterated bliss filled with gold dabloons, rainbow dust sprinkles, and unicorns line dancing the Electric Shuffle. The playoffs...sans the Red Sox and Yankees. You can't tell me that this wouldn't make you want to kiss puppy noses and drink the sweet nectar of northeast baseball failure (unless your an insufferable Sawx douche or a damn Yankee). Right now, the Tampa Bay Devil Rays are 4.5 games in front of the Red Sox and 10.5 games up on New York in the AL East. Toronto...yes, those pesky Blue Jays are a game out of third in that division. If this doesn't make your naughty parts tingle, then you don't have naughty parts. Either that, or you're old like the Yankees and can't quite use them anymore. Or, you're dating Madonna. How ambiguously gay is that? Moreover, the Twins beat the the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim Tajikistan Wonder Bread to tie the Red Sox for the Wild Card. THE WILD CARD! I've never pulled for any team in the AL, but I'm a huge Twin and Ray fan at the moment. It's August 22, this 2008th year of the baby Jesus. The Commie Sox are tied for the Wild Card and the Yankees all but done. There is one week and a month left to the season. Picture the baseball playoffs in which Manny Ramirez is present, yet the Red Sox not. Joe Torre is there...the Yankees...no. This is making me hot...I need to calm down...maybe sit in a bucket of ice water. I know that the Cubs need to get there themselves, but as of now they have a 5.5 game lead on Milwaukee in the Central with a favorable schedule ahead in the near future. It's been well documented that I hate the Commie Sox and Yankees, and I can't wait for ESPN to writhe in pain covering the Rays stomping through the AL Playoffs.

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