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"The Office" Quote of the Day
Written by wrigleyville   
Thursday, 21 February 2008
To ease my suffering through the Hollywood writer's strike, and to hopefully gain a few chuckles and masculine butt pats from my peers, I've decided to rehash some of my favorite quotes from my favorite TV show--"The Office."

Once more, the "Benihana Christmas" episode is clutch. Today's installment comes to us from the Benihana hibachi, where Dwight is helplessly much too far away from Michael, Andy and Jim and thus cannont partake in the action and Asian Hooteredness. Jim, always striking at the opportune moment, ensures that the following hilarity ensues:

[Dwight calls for Jim's attention. Note that there are two people sitting between them, and that whenever Dwight moves his head forward to look at Jim, Jim moves his head backward so that Dwight has to then move his head back...and so on and so forth. Now that Dwight has Jim's attention...]

Dwight: "Jim! Jim! What...what's happening?"

Jim: "Oh. [points to Cindy, the waitress] She's asleep."

Dwight (matter-of-factly): "Oh...Narcolepsy."

Jim: "Probably."

Andy (to Cindy, in their conversation away from Jim and Dwight's, asking her to describe her fantasy home): "Now open your eyes and describe it to me."

Cindy (opens her eyes): "I...don't know...it has four bedrooms and a loft..."

Dwight (back to his and Jim's conversation): "Oh my gosh, now she's up!"

Jim: "And she's trying to correctly butcher a goose, but she's having trouble coming up with it."

Dwight: "Oh, okay. Cindy! Yo, Cindy! Cindy! Hold its neck back and insert the knife below the jaw. Bring it all the way around, there's going to be a good amount of blood. [Cindy looks confused and the woman next to Dwight is disgusted.] Don't let it bother you. Have a bucket there, for the blood... and the innards... and the feathers."

[Queue the "Jim Face."]

And, scene. Comedic genius. This episode is just money when it comes to the funny. And, I evidently like rhyming two-syllable words. Even though this is classic Dwight, the set-up to this exchange, in blue font above the red quotes, is when Jim bobs his head back and forth in the opposite directions Dwight is bobbing his head so that Dwight can never get a clear line of sight of Jim. Great stuff...I can't wait for the new episodes.

My first whiff of baseball will be tomorrow. My LSU Tigers will be facing Wrigleyville's Indiana Hoosiers in the first game of the NCAA baseball season. I understand that IU isn't very good at the baseball, but neither has LSU been quite so good in the last several years after the Skip Bertman Era. I don't know if I'll make a game in the series, what with the weather and Mrs. Nutsack's plans to visit her parents this weekend. Anypoo, it's baseball, and I'll take it. Have a good Thursday, everybody.

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