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Paul Sullivan Wants More Wrigley Drunkenness
Written by wrigleyville   
Saturday, 22 August 2009
The insightful Cubs beat reporter has 10 suggestions for the Cubs new (almost) owner, including trading Zambrano, hiring a team shrink for Zambrano (seems unnecessary if you're going to trade him) and this brilliant tidbit at No. 8:

8. Lower beer prices at Wrigley: It was one of the first things Arte Moreno did when he took over the Angels. Fans love Arte Moreno. Also, continue to encourage fans to report idiots by texting security on their cell phones when someone is out of control in their area. Fans are often reluctant to get involved, but a text alert to security can alert them to over-served morons who are bothering people around them. Other ballparks already do this.

Well, Paul, wouldn't we need fewer snitches if there was less drunkenness? And one way to encourage less drunkenness would be to raise beer prices at Wrigley - or ban beer sales altogether in the bleachers or in certain sections of the bleachers. Not lower prices.

After all, why would you want to make it easier for things like this:

vicbeer.jpg
Or this:

dodhat.jpg
Or this:

drunkcub.jpg
Cheaper beer leads to more beer consumption. More beer consumption leads to more stupid things happening. More stupid things lead to the further beclowning of the franchise.

More bad advice from Paul Sullivan.


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