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Cubs Fan Threatens Futile, Sad Gesture
Written by wrigleyville   
Friday, 23 October 2009
It's time to wade into the Bleacher Report, this time looking into the thoughts of one Jake Karmel: This is the worst news I have heard in a long time as a Cubs fan. WV: Good God, what's happened? Yes, worse then Aramis Ramirez out with an injury or when D-Lee got hurt a couple years ago. I think you mean "than," but I'm guessing Bleacher Report has cut back on copy editors. But what could be worse than losing two of the team's best hitters? Is Mark Prior hurt again? Milton Bradley could be back as a Cub in 2010. ACCCKKK!J!#ELEVEN!!! Yes, bringing back a player with the second highest OBP on the team would be much worse than losing two of the team's sluggers for an extended period of time. Oh, the humanity! But I'm guessing you're not talking statistically, are you? Why? Didn't think so. Former Texas Rangers hitting "guru," Rudy Jamarillo is going to be the new Cubs swing coach in 2010.  Apparently, he has a good standing relationship with Bradley, so this can't hurt right? I'm pretty sure his last name is "Jaramillo," but give me a second to work the Google machine. ... Yep, it is indeed "Jaramillo." Mr. Karmel - or is it Kamrel? - you are doing a disservice to your cause with sloppy spelling and grammar. Wrong.  I could care less about Jamarillo's relationship with Bradley. Or how to spell Jaramillo. If the Ricketts family wants to make 2010 like 2006, so be it. Oh nos. Those were tough midyear elections for the Republicans. And the Ricketts are Republicans. I will boycott Cubs baseball until Bradley leaves. What, pray tell, does this boycott include? Pickets? Grammatically shaky posts on the Internets? Silence? Just like us fans did in 2006, I won't attend a game, nor will I watch this decrepit team on TV. I believe you mean "we fans." An easy way to remember this is by taking the word "fans" out. Does it make sense to say, "Just like us did in 2006..."? Of course not. Just like we did. We fans. As far as your logic, the Cubs attendance in 2006 was 3.1 million (though it did get a little sparse late in the year). But some of "us fans" did go to games in 2006. As far as decrepit, did you suddenly start talking about the Washington Nationals? The Cubs finished above .500 this year, despite a surprising number of injuries to key players. Hopefully the Ricketts family makes like the Tribune Company did the following year.  Firring team president at the time Andy McPhail and spending lots of money.  Only this time getting rid of Bradley. It would cost a lot of money to just "get rid" of Bradley. They'd have to eat his contract. Bad idea. And what does "firring" mean? I don't think Jamarillo could help Bradley.  Milton needs more help then just a swing.  He needs attitude help. Jaramillo. That is a fair argument on Bradley. But what if Jaramillo is good with Milton? Takes him to dinner? Tells him funny stories? Long walks in the park? Makes him a glass-half-full kinda guy? Then are you on board? Teammate, Ryan Theriot said on the Waddle and Silvy show that the only time Bradley was happy was after he won a card game on the team plane.  Even after home runs, the man was unhappy. Why is there a comma after "teammate"? And why does Theriot begrudge Milton his happiness? And if this is true, perhaps the Cubs should have played more cards with Bradley - letting him win. All the time. In the clubhouse. Between at-bats. During pitching changes. Using your logic, that could have turned the whole season around - even though Soto, Fontenot and Soriano didn't hit; Ramirez, Zambrano and Soriano were hurt; and the bullpen was shaky, at best. Why keep an unhappy teammate? Because he can hit the shit out of the ball when he's right. It's not a service sorority they're running over there. Jim Hendry, if you keep this poor excuse for a ball player and a teammate, you deserve to leave the organization. I envision Jake Karmel (Kamrel?) looking sternly into the camera right now. Fool me once with the signing of Bradley, shame on me.  Fool me twice by keeping him, SHAME ON YOU JIM HENDRY! The meds appear to be wearing off. Hope we wrap this up soon, as it's getting weird. Not only was he a poor excuse for a teammate, he was a poor excuse for a ball player.  He underachieved.  He hit .257 with 40 RBIs and 12 home runs!  What a $10 million waste! You have now used up your daily allotment of exclamation points. You may not use any more until 7 a.m. on Saturday. Dear Hendry.  PLEASE, for the sake of Cubs nation, get rid of Milton Bradley.  The time has come to rid the team of this "disease." I don't think you need quotation marks when you are speaking metaphorically. I think you can just do it and we, the readers, are to understand your point.


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