Hemorrhoids Are So Two Days Ago

As mentioned during the weekend, Kaz Matsui has a bit of a pain in his rear. At first, Kaz's situation was diagnosed as a simple case of hemorrhoids, which, of course, made me snicker with amusement.

However, what do we find this morning that makes me laugh uncontrollably? Yeah, Kaz Matsui has the anal fissures. Which reminds me...

Dwight: "OK, great. Dermatitis. Thank you Angela. I'll make sure that's covered. OK, now. Who wrote this, hysterical one? Anal fissures?"

Kevin: "That's a real thing."

Dwight: "Yeah, but no one here has it."

Keving (admittingly): "Someone does."

Kudos to the guys over at Rotoworld.com for giving us the definition of anal fissures. Because, none of the degenerates skimming over Rotoworld's posts aren't going to Google or Wiki the hell out "anal fissures." In all seriousness, best of luck to Kaz in sewing up his butt. And to Felix Pie for getting his testicle untorsioned. Baseball...it's rough.

Kaz Matsui Has a Pain in His Rear

He was removed from a game on February 29 because of hemorrhoids. Get well soon, Kaz.